Updated: Sep 26
We've all been there.
We've all been left reeling from the bad choices and relational wounds others inflict upon us. Sometimes those wounds feel purposed, sometimes accidental. Either way, we all have to deal with relational trauma and hurt.
The first thing God tells us in that place of wounding is, it's okay to feel however you feel.
It's okay to feel depressed, angry, sullen, sad, neglected and rejected. God never shames us for our feelings.
The next thing God tells us is, "let's deal with it!" We need to address those wounds and be healed. God never leaves us in our woundedness, to fester and let infectious bitterness set in. God calls us to work through the hurt on our side of it, but also to address the person that has hurt us.
Sometimes, we may need to work through that hurt on our own first, so we don't end up hurting the other person in the process of seeking healing. But eventually, we need to create the space for healing and reconciliation in the relationship. The other person may not want to admit the hurt they've caused or seek reconciliation. But we need to at least make the attempt. Then, if reconciliation isn't desired, we can move on, knowing we did everything we could.
Don't hold onto hurt.
Don't let it fester.
You're only hurting yourself more.
The other person usually moves on quickly, not even aware of the hurt you're feeling. Let them know.
Give them the chance to make it right.
But don't let relational hurt lead you down the path of bitterness.
Feel it, deal with it, and learn how to move on. It's the best thing you can do for yourself.